Geekery

Virtual smoking

Posted on 04. Jan, 2010 by Jake.

Smoking used to be so much more fun. Back in the day smoking a Stuyvesant was an automatic passport to the good life, just one puff and the smoker was instantly transported to someone’s private yacht to drink expensive alcohol while cavorting with semi-naked models . Or, if adventure was your thing, a drag of a Camel used to be the only satisfying end to a nice swing through the jungle. These were the days before smoking was bad for you, and so absolutely everyone used to smoke freely, in restaurants, in movies, on aeroplanes, in hospitals and churches. But no more. Today’s smoker is a lonely creature, rejected and marginalised, forced outside to get their fix even in the dead of winter, scolded by doctors and ostracised by friends. Even the most committed smoker could be forgiven for attempting to quit. But like rock ‘n roll, smoking isn’t dead – it’s just gotten safer and more electronic – Twisp, the first electronic cigarette available in South Africa, offers smokers a nicotine fix without the actual smoke – instead emitting a kind of vapour that is apparently free of tar and carcinogenic compounds.

I don’t smoke, since I am unfortunately neither a wealthy playboy on a yacht or a rugged jungle adventurer. So to check out the Twisp had to rely on the testimony of my friend Wessel, once a committed smoker but now a despicable traitor who has sold out by buying the Twisp Dura C E-Cigarette. Wessel says that he has, so far, been able to stop smoking normal cigarettes due to switching to the Dura C. He says that it is more similar to smoking a hubby bubbly than a cigarette.
Wessel says that while he can get his nicotine fix using the Twisp he still finds it hard to get used to the feel of the cold, hard cigarette that appears to be made from porcelain, and to inhaling, which he says lacks the ‘burn’ that he craves most when smoking. On the other hand, though, he enjoys being able to finally smoke in restaurants and films again, and says that the device is also a good conversation piece.

Depending on which Twisp cartridge you choose you could pay from 800 to 1000 rand for a starter pack which will include everything you need to get smoking. On top of that one needs to replace the liquid that goes in the cartridges every now and then at R250 a pop. Expensive perhaps, but it works out as much cheaper than buying a pack a day over the course of a year. And yes, the Twisp is a lot healthier than normal smoking, but if you look in the mirror one day to find that, despite not owning a yacht or ever doing any jungle exploration you are still a smoker with rapidly decaying lungs, rather than rushing out to get gum or patches or even bizarre electronic cigarettes maybe the best option is to quit the old fashioned way – cold turkey.

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Water is so hot right now

Posted on 17. Dec, 2009 by Jake.

Let’s face it. Water is often boring. Maybe not when it’s in a swimming pool or the sea and certainly not during devastating floods. But water that comes out of the faucet at the tap near you is just totally yawn-worthy. Yes, I know, without it we’d die, but I would suggest that very few people would bother with it if they didn’t have to and, perhaps unsurprisingly, it is an unpopular topic at dinner parties. So it stands to reason that, at some stage, someone will invent a gadget that intends to give water a much-needed makeover and make it a bit more exciting. The Colour Changing Faucet Light manufactured by the not-too-manly company LaFemme Products transforms the water coming out of your faucet into a vibrant bright blue when cold and a festive red when hot. Could this be the PR boost that water from the tap so sorely needs?

The Faucet Light doesn’t just sit around looking pretty. It has a purpose. By changing the colour of the water using LCD lights when it gets hot, the product stops those who use its faucet from inadvertently burning themselves. Which may not win its manufacturers a Nobel Prize, but as someone who burns himself fairly often I can appreciate the sentiment.

All in all, a fun and not altogether useless product that will only set you back roughly R200 including packaging and postage if you order it from Amazon.com. My biggest problem with the gadget is that it makes water look so beautifully colourful that one’s natural first reaction would be to stare at it flowing from the tap for hours on end – which is not a great idea in these hard times of dwindling water supplies. But, used with restraint the Faucet Light may save you from a blister or two, and that’s never a bad thing.

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Been there, rocked out, got the t-shirt: The Electronic Rock Guitar Shirt

Posted on 07. Dec, 2009 by Jake.

Once upon a time if you wanted to be a rock god you had to spend years actually learning how to play a real guitar. Then Guitar Heroes came along and changed all the rules, to the point that now there is a generation of youngsters who believe that ‘like, real guitars are so lame’. This is a day and age where rock stars seem a bit obsolete, and it is seen as far more socially acceptable to work through your rocker fantasies in a safe way, behind a television screen with a piece of plastic. That way you get to miss out on rehab while retaining the sense of accomplishment that comes from being a true hard-rocking legend, even if you will only ever get to hear the cheers of virtual crowds.

Now the virtual guitar generation has taken it one step further by introducing the Electronic Rock Guitar Shirt, brought to you by everyone’s favourite purveyors of awesome although probably slightly unnecessary gadgetry – Thinkgeek.com. It’s a t-shirt with an image of a guitar on it, a mini-amp attached and a magnetic pick. Each button on the neck of the guitar triggers a different major chord, which means you can use the shirt to play any famous classic rock song as long as it is completely in major (which many are). Depeche Mode fans will have to wait for the next version to come out if they want to play minor chords. If you want to start a virtual t-shirt band you could always get a friend to buy the Electronic Drum Kit Shirt, also from ThinkGeek. Those who have to hear you ‘practice’ all day may soon learn to hate you though. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

According to its inventors, the Electronic Rock Guitar Shirt is ‘not a toy that plays pre-canned musical riffs, it is a real musical instrument that allows you to play your favourite songs and sound great doing it’. Which is a bit like Twilight author Stephanie Meyer saying that her books are ‘serious literature’. Make no mistake, no matter what those promoting it tells you, the Guitar Shirt is just a toy, a novelty item that people may laugh at in generations to come. For now, though, don’t let the virtual guitar revolution pass you by.

It will set you back $30 and you can buy it here: http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-apparel/interactive/

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Future Framing – The eStarling WiFi Digital Photo Frame

Posted on 25. Nov, 2009 by Jake.

Soon to be placed in the same pile as similarly forgotten innovations such as the typewriter, phones with dials instead of buttons and Vista is the framed photograph. Everyone has a digital camera now and getting your pics developed and printed in hard copy seems a bit too much of a chore in this day and age. Enter the digital photo frame, an invention that will put many a ‘one-hour photo’ shop out of work by allowing the user to upload jpgs and other picture files straight into a device with an LCD screen that looks like a photo frame. And, unlike old-school frames, many digital versions boast a slide-show option allowing one to display more than one photo in a single frame. Digital framing is likely to become the norm some day soon,. and eStarling is at the forefront of this mini-revolution – their WiFi Digital Photo Frame takes the technology to the next level.

The eStartling WiFi Digital Photo Frame’s major innovation setting it apart from its competition is the WiFi bit – after connecting the frame via the seeframe.com website you can enable it to automatically connect to photo sharing sites on the internet. You can also register the frame with an email address, allowing friends and family to send images straight to the frame. Once its set up the frame will automatically scan the various sites you have connected it to for new pics. And, if you’re worry about dodgy uncle Dave sending you pics of his drunken exploits there is even an option that allows you to choose which email addresses you want to receive pics from. That is one intelligent picture frame.

The only thing that may stop you from rushing out and ordering one of these babies online is the price – they are $250 (for us economically challenged South Africans that’s nearly 2 grand for a picture frame). So for now, even if not for long, maybe the old-fashioned wooden version still has some leverage…

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Coffee without the break – The USB Coffee Warmer

Posted on 10. Nov, 2009 by Jake.

Having focussed lately on quite a few gadgets that have several functions, today I thought I’d keep it simple and concentrate on a device that can do one thing and one thing only. And the USB Coffee Warmer could not under any circumstances be accused of doing more than one thing.

A small USB-powered hot plate that sits next to your keyboard as if to say, ‘c’mon, spill it!’, the USB Coffee Warmer is for those people who work too hard and drink their coffee too slowly. It has the sole function of keeping your hot beverage hot, a function that it fulfils with aplomb. So in a sense I suppose it’s a successful gadget.

Intuitively, though, I have fundamental problems with the concept. As a geek and a non-smoker, the only opportunity I ever get to do something other than sitting in front of a computer screen is when I go and get another cup of coffee. Similar to those offices which ban Facebook, this is one of those inventions which seems to shout ‘work harder! Why are you sitting around drinking coffee. Now you can drink coffee and work at the same time, thanks to the USB Coffee Warmer!’ I have worked at places that would not have hesitated to buy one of these for each of it’s employees and then ban coffee breaks.

I have a friend whose dad once said to me, ‘You know, when we were growing up they told us that all this new technology would make our lives easier, and allow us to work less. Turns out it has just forced us to work harder’. And I completely see his point. In an age where we are supposed to be connected to the world and ready to reply to another email at all times, the coffee break is sacred. Please don’t get me one of these for Christmas.

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